You Don't Mess With the Johan

I know, I know, nobody wants to hear about someone else's fantasy baseball team. And it is not like I have never won a fantasy league before. But hey, this is my blog and I can write about whatever I want so indulge me for a few minutes. So, with the conclusion of the 2008 Major League Baseball regular season, my team the Bad News Blairs can officially claim victory in the CBS Sportsline fantasy league known as the Bleacher Bums. I follow in the footsteps of good friend and fellow blogger Rob Schumann, the 2007 league champion and frequent trading partner in the league.

My acquisition of Mets pitcher Johan Santana and shortstop Jose Reyes from Rob in exchange for Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton and future Dodgers ace Clayton Kershaw put me in "win now" mode for 2008 and set the stage for a strong second half run. It is a very competitive, tough league with a great bunch of guys, which makes the achievement particularly satisfying. I learned everything I know about the general managing biz from Red Sox GM Theo Epstein, so let me give a shout out to him. By the way, Theo, still haven't gotten those playoff tickets in the mail yet. I'll just stop by Fenway Park to pick them up. Sound good?

First Palin, Then Campaign Suspension. What Now?

As posted today on Slate.com, John McCain's next 10 hail mary stunts:

1. Returns to Vietnam and jails himself.

2. Offers the post of "vice vice president" to Warren Buffett.

3. Challenges Obama to suspend campaign so they both can go and personally drill for oil offshore.

4. Learns to use computer.

5. Does bombing run over Taliban-controlled tribal areas of Pakistan.

6. Offers to forgo salary, sell one house.

7. Sex-change operation.

8. Suspends campaign until Nov. 4, offers to start being president right now.

9. Sells Alaska to Russia for $700 billion.

10. Pledges to serve only one term. OK, half a term.

The Sub Life

9/11/08
Parent Night

Having settled into the job my first couple of weeks, I soon faced yet another in the many line of "firsts" that have come my way this fall as a teacher: Parent Night. The strange thing with teachers is that, due to the nature of our work, unlike most people we actually prefer facing a room full of children to a room full of adults. A room full of adults is actually more stressful for us, not less. So there is a certain amount of anxiety that comes with preparing for parent night. When you factor in that this is a school known for a very high level of parent involvement (i.e. I knew the room would be packed) and that fellow staff members kept asking me if I was nervous about parent night - thus making me more nervous about parent night - there were definitely more butterflies than normal.

Some of my readers may have experienced parent night as either a parent or as a teacher, but for me this was uncharted territory. I attended one in 2005 as a student teacher in North Carolina, but the classroom teacher Heather did all the preparation and the talking as I was still an education student at that point. Other than some help with the setup, my role was strictly as observer. Not this time. In tandem with Fran, the 5/6 math and science teacher, I was going to have to do more than just watch. I knew up front that we would do the presentation together in Fran's room and that I would only be talking about the language arts and social studies curriculum, so that definitely put me at ease at least somewhat. Plus, I had already met many of the parents the first couple of weeks of school, so this was not a group of strangers.

I got to school a little early and took part in some of the games the PE teacher had setup for the parents. Played some floor hockey with a soccer ball instead of a puck and a long foam stick in place of an actual hockey stick, thus making it very hard to make the ball go anywhere fast. I basically just ran around a lot and occasionally touched the ball when it emerged from a scrum of parents. Was kind of fun to take the edge off a bit, though. We all headed over to the room and then the fun began. Fran opened the proceedings with a discussion of the weekly schedule, and at the mention of word study turned it over to me for a brief explanation of what we did in word study. Once the ball was rolling with word study, I proceeded to rattle off my entire language arts presentation before turning it back over to Fran. Not exactly the way we drew it up, but whatcha gonna do? Fran kind of laughed as I turned it back over to him and I grinned sheepishly.

I must say that during both the language arts and social studies presentations I was very relaxed, despite the fact that there was like 75 parents in the room at the time. Was kind of hard to gauge the parents' level of satisfaction when the night was over, as they are not going to come right out and be like "You nailed it" or "You really crapped the bed tonight" or hold up scores like Olympic judges. However, Friday morning the curriculum director of the school, who is also the parent of a child in my class, said that the parents were very happy with what they heard and satisfied as they left the room that night. So, it appears as if my first parent night was a success. And the best part is that I don't have to do another one for a year. Whoo hoo!

Female Fans Out For Season With Tom Brady's Knee Injury

As a Patriots fan, only the Onion could make me laugh about a story that otherwise made me want to throw up in my mouth and light myself on fire:

FOXBOROUGH, MA—More than 90 percent of female football fans were lost for the season on Sunday when New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady suffered a left knee injury that will require extensive treatment. The Patriots announced Monday that Brady, the 2007 NFL Most Valuable Player and arguably the NFL's most handsome man, will be placed on injured reserve, where despite being no less attractive than before his injury, he will only be partially visible for the rest of the 2008-2009 season.

Bill Belichick held a press conference Tuesday confirming that Brady will have surgery, ending his 128-game combined starting-and-high-visibility streak, the third longest for a quarterback and the longest ever for a quarterback heartthrob.

Brady left Sunday's game against Kansas City after suffering an ugly anterior cruciate ligament tear in his incredibly handsome left knee after being hit by merely average-looking Chiefs safety Bernard Pollard.

"We feel badly for the nation's women about the injury," Belichick said. "And for Tom, of course. You hate to see anyone with that kind of masculine yet boyish appeal go down. No one has worked harder or done more for this team's female fan base than Tom has, and we expect him to set his rugged, chiseled jaw, keep his twinkling blue eyes on the prize, and be ready to get back on the field and in front of the cameras by next year."

Matt Cassel, who analysts say looked "consistent and confident" while guiding New England to its 20th straight regular-season win after Brady was hurt and "okay but not remarkable" in jeans and a polo shirt after the game, will start Sunday at the New York Jets, although there are doubts Cassel can win as many games and women as Brady.

"Well, as far as my role on this team goes, I'm not trying to be Tom Brady. I'm just trying to be Matt," Cassel said when subbing for Brady on his regular weekly radio show. "I mean, I have to just be myself, or else the ladies will sense I'm faking it, and in the end, that'll make it worse. I just hope there's one special fan group out there for me."

Cassel has been a second fiddle his entire football career, even in college at Southern California, where he was backup and wingman to lovable tousle-headed manchild Matt Leinart.

But football and demographics analysts agree that Brady's injury surely changes the rugged, weatherbeaten complexion of the entire NFL, where the Patriots, winners of three Super Bowls since 2001 with Brady as their quarterback and spokesmodel, were the strong female-fan favorite. However, Belichick denied the team reached out to any other more experienced or handsome quarterbacks.

Although losing Brady's strong arm and sculpted face will not be easy for the Patriots, the impact of his loss is expected to be felt around the NFL, where Brady has been the leading performer both on and off the field for the last several seasons. League commissioner Roger Goodell called an emergency owner's meeting Monday in which attendees discussed measures designed to compensate for Brady's loss, such as giving poise and diction lessons to Peyton or Eli Manning, getting Brett Favre a new wardrobe and a decent haircut, or teaching Ben Affleck how to play football.

Unfortunately for the NFL, Brady's loss seems to have affected more than just the Patriots and women. Many Boston-area fans of both genders, claiming that the team isn't worth watching without Brady, have concentrated their attention on the waning and somewhat disheveled Red Sox season or the attractive upcoming Celtics' NBA title defense. The sports media has likewise gone into shock, with columnist Bill Simmons saying he will no longer watch football this season, Sports Illustrated canceling large Brady-themed sections of this years' upcoming swimsuit issue, and NBC Football Night In America analyst Cris Collinsworth bursting into tears and collapsing into Peter King's arms upon receiving the news.

"No one else in football has Brady's unique talents—the physical gifts of build, height, arms, cheekbones, piercingly sultry field vision, the combination of arm strength and accuracy with a sense of tenderness, the combination of smirk and pout—along with the intangibles and the ability to look good in everything," said Tom Chiarella, who scouted and evaluated Brady for the September issue of Esquire. "It's impossible to estimate the impact of his loss, but it will almost certainly mean the loss of most female fans, many Boston-area fans, fair-weather fans, and the majority of mainstream media fans. The NFL is really looking at a worst-case scenario here, one that it never wanted to happen: A football season that's only watched by actual football fans."

Grant About Town

September 6, 2008

Amelie - San Francisco, CA

As some of you might be aware the home base for G's Spot has migrated west to the bay area in California. I am currently living in Portola Valley, about 30 miles south of San Francisco. So now I have a whole new city to explore, and just the forum to share what I find with "Grant About Town." This weekend I made my first trip into the city to meet a friend, Veronica, for drinks at a wine bar called Amelie. The bar is located in the Nob Hill neighborhood, not far from Russian Hill area she was coming from. It took me a couple of hours to come up with the place through extensive research on yelp.com . Cool site by the way, with plenty of information and reviews of bars and restaurants and a very easy to use sorting feature where you can search by neighborhood then modify further by walking distance (1 mile), biking distance (2 miles), driving distance (5 miles) etc. to find stuff around that area.

Let me first say that if you are coming to this place from outside the city, plan on allowing A LOT of time to find parking and most likely shelling out for a parking garage. Cab it or walk if you live in the city. San Francisco is not that big a downtown relative to my previous home, Chicago, and I would not have drove were I living in the city. For Veronica it was not a problem since she could walk to the bar. For me, it was about a 45 minute drive followed by another 15-20 minutes trolling for parking on and around Polk Street. Fortunately for me in this case I had the option of parking in her grandmother's garage, which I did so as to free myself from my car once and for all. A short walk and nice chat later, we were at the wine bar.

My first impression was that it is a rather long, narrow room, but decorated in a modern kitschy style that I liked. It being 8:30p on a Saturday night the place was crowded...I'd wonder about the place if it wasn't. We made our way to the bar and, after perusing the wine list, ordered a couple of sparkling white wines, a relative bargain at $7.50/glass. It was very tasty, kind of a sweeter version of champagne. There being no seats at the bar, we made our way towards the front and approached the three seats you see in the picture (above, right). There was a guy sitting on the aisle seat talking on his cellphone, and for some reason he said the two seats next to him were taken when it was clear that: 1) He was not there with anyone; and 2) Even if he was, they were nowhere to be seen.

Having been shot down for the seats, we made our way to a couple of wooden folding chairs just outside the front door on the sidewalk by the window to the bar. We were able to place our drinks on a ledge and sip them but the glasses could not be outside, or so we were told. After being harrassed every 5 minutes when we held the glass for a sip, and finally being told by another waiter that we could not drink out there at all, I finally said enough is enough, handed the guy my half-consumed drink and walked out. Between snooty cell phone guy and the endless parade of cloying waitstaff, I must say I was left with a bad taste in my mouth. However, I liked the ambiance of the place and the wine list enough to give Amelie another shot in the future.