Working for the Weekend

May 19 and 26, 2007

For those loyal readers who look forward to reading about my wild and wacky experiences at the unnamed educational service, it has been a while since my last post. And for that, I apologize. It has been a combination of factors that have lead to the hiatus, the main one being that I cut back on my schedule a bit in the last couple of months to one day per weekend with the occasional weekend off. I was burning out a little with the long drive and working 7 days a week thing. Needed to find some balance in my life, know what I mean?

That long drive has gotten a whole lot longer with the start of the Dan Ryan (my route through downtown to the southwest side) highway construction project in March. It has been an absolute backbreaker for me and has almost doubled my commute time to work each Saturday. Despite the fact that I only use it once a week, the Dan Ryan construction easily beats out the Chicago Transit Authority’s Brown Line (my train to work during the week) expansion project for #1 on Grant’s “Least Favorite Chicago Area Construction Projects” list. I drop more F bombs and shake my head in disbelief on that one trip to the southwest side more than I do all week if not all month on the Brown Line. I guess you could consider that an underhanded compliment for the much-maligned CTA.

The other thing going on is that I have been focusing on getting out resumes for teaching jobs and preparing for the various Illinois tests I have to take to be certified in the state. Related to that, I just found out yesterday via e-mail that I passed both the Illinois Basic Skills test and the K-9 Assessment of Professional Teaching (APT) tests that I took last month over one grueling day at McCormick Place. In the words of the great academic Homer Simpson: "I am so smart! I am so smart! I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T. I mean S-M-A-R-T." One more test to go next month – APT Content Area Exercises - and I have heard it is an easy one. Now if I can only find that teaching job…

So, I have worked the last couple of Saturdays and must say that they have been very pleasant indeed other than the ridiculous Dan Ryan traffic I mentioned earlier. For one, I have generally gotten a good group of kids to work with each hour, kids that are able to focus and don’t distract each other. The other thing that has happened a lot more the last couple of weeks is that kids who were scheduled to be at my table of three have not showed up, leaving me with two kids to work with instead of the standard three. It doesn’t seem like a big deal, but trust me, it makes a huge difference in terms of the craziness/stress factor and allows me to give more attention to each child.

Before I wrap up, a funny story that happened today. I was working with a young boy and was trying to explain the difference between fact and opinion. I said to him “What is your favorite sport?” He said: “I don’t have a favorite sport.” So, I said: “Who is your favorite singer or musician?” He said: “I don’t listen to music.” Running out of ideas fast, I said: “What is your favorite subject at school?” Much to my surprise, this was the question that he chose to answer. “Math,” he said. So I went on to explain that his preference for math would be considered an opinion while saying that math is one of the subjects at school is a fact. Another fact: Kids will be difficult sometimes for no other reason than to test your ability to deal with it. Guess I passed that test, too.

Dear Mr. Dork

It would be an understatement to say that Major League Baseball players have been producing a lot of bad PR lately, what with Barry Bonds' tainted chase of the home run record, Rafael Palmeiro lying to Congress about his steroid use and the shadow that hangs over the game because of performance enhancing drugs. So, as a fan of the game, I felt it was my duty to report on two positive and rather funny stories involving baseball players' interactions with the MOST IMPORTANT participants in the game: The fans.

During a recent game versus the Blue Jays at Jacobs Field, Indians fan Jeff Raycher and about 100 of his fellow Indians fans were getting on Jays outfielder Vernon Wells with various verbal taunts and jokes. At one point, Wells faked like he was throwing a ball towards Raycher and then threw it to another section. Later, Wells came back to the outfield with a ball inscribed with a special message just for Raycher.

http://slam.canoe.ca/Slam/Baseball/MLB/Toronto/2007/05/08/4163067-sun.html

So as not to give too much away, click on the link above for the text of the message. Note: For some reason the story leaves out the hilarious saluation "Dear Mr. Dork" but you can see it in the picture. Suffice it to say, Wells won major points for his sense of humor and overall good natured handling of the situation. I already knew the guy was cool - He's on my fantasy baseball team.

The other story is of a slightly less PG variety. Reds outfielder Ken Griffey, Jr. provided a gift of a more, um, personal nature in response to ribbing from a Dodgers fan. After taking the verbal abuse for several innings, Griffey finally decided he'd had enough and proceeded to make some fat jokes about the fan and tell him he couldn't hold (Griffey's) jock. Then, he proceeded to go one better by giving him one of his jockstraps.

http://www.aolsportsblog.com/2007/05/14/this-heckler-actually-can-carry-ken-griffeys-jock/

These are only two examples, and I know that for every positive story put out there some disgruntled or jaded fan can come up with another about the player who told them to "F off" when they asked for an autograph, turned out to be a cheater, beat up his wife or didn't pay his taxes. However, it is nice to know that there are some athletes out there who get it and understand how lucky they are to make millions playing a game for a living, and that even the smallest interaction a fan has with them is a memory the fan will have for a lifetime.

As a case in point, after a Red Sox game at Fenway Park in April 1986 my dad and I went over by the players' parking lot in the hope of seeing some of my heroes and maybe getting some autographs. We waited by a chain link fence as the players gradually emerged from the locker room: Jim Rice, Dwight Evans, coach Joe Morgan. Most got in their BMW, Mercedes or Porsche and left without much more interaction than a wave and a smile to the fans.

Just as we were about to leave, outfielder Tony Armas came out and walked over to his Wagoneer, parked just on the other side of the fence from where I was standing with my dad. As he walked up to the car he stopped, pointed to the ground and said to me "Hey kid, there's a ball under my car." At first I was startled that he was talking to me. He said it again and got my attention. Some of the people around me thought he was messing with me and started laughing.

"Come over here," he said, so I walked in and knelt down by his car and carefully scanned the pavement hoping for a souvenir. Sure enough, there was a ball. I grabbed it. "Thanks, Mr. Armas," I said and whipped out my autograph book so he could sign it for me. As if that weren't enough, a few minutes later pitcher Dennis "Oil Can" Boyd came out, gave me an autograph and chatted for several minutes while sitting in his Mercedes with the door open. Coincidentally, we ran into Boyd again later while driving away from Fenway Park as his car ended up in front of ours on Boylston Street.

Though they weren't even among my favorite players on the team, by giving me a few minutes of their time Armas and Boyd each made a fan for life that day. And though they may not realize it, with their recent actions Wells and Griffey did as well.

The Antichrist Returns to Gotham

As has been well established on this site and elsewhere if you know me or have talked to me for more than a minute, I am a die hard Boston Red Sox fan. So it was with great interest that I read the text message sent to me yesterday from my friend Mike's younger brother, Jon, somehow a Yankees fan despite growing up in a family of smart people. It read "Clemens is a Yankee!!!"

Those four words seared into my psyche. The pitcher I had once loved as he K'd 20 Mariners, took the Sox to the brink of a title in '86 and won 3 Cy Young Awards, only to dog it towards the end amidst a contract dispute before skipping town to Toronto after the'96 season, was making a return engagement to the Evil Empire. There was a time when such a development would really bug me as a Red Sox fan. However, that time has passed and I was even a bit surprised by how little the news affected me. Ditto for fellow Sox fan Bill Simmons, aka "Sports Guy" on ESPN.com, whose classic piece "Is Clemens the Antichrist?" is linked below.

http://proxy.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?id=1206543

After taking in the message for a few moments I promptly replied: "They need him. Their pitching is a trainwreck" to which Jon responded "Won't be for long!" Yes, I thought, the 44 year-old with groin problems who has been pitching to the friendlier (i.e. no DH) lineups of the National League is going to return to the harder hitting AL, save the day 6 innings at a time and deliver a title for the Yankees. That is, if he doesn't break down physically, ruffle feathers in the notoriously tight Yankee clubhouse by receiving prima donna treatment or get busted for using Human Growth Hormone (HGH) first.

http://newyork.yankees.mlb.com/news/article.jsp?ymd=20070506&content_id=1949377&vkey=news_mlb&fext=.jsp&c_id=mlb

Am I biased in this discussion? Of course. I hate both the Yankees and Clemens. Clemens left Boston after three final lackluster seasons (1993-96) with a lot more weight and without so much as a "Thank You" to the fans. Then he promptly "re-dedicated" himself and won 2 Cy Youngs with the Blue Jays to show Sox GM Dan Duquette how wrong he was for letting him go. Where was this work ethic at the end of his time in Boston, when he was more likely to hit a plate of chicken wings than the weight room. Then he went to the Yankees only to bail on them to return home to Houston, who he is now bailing on to return to the Yankees because the Astros stink. Are you seeing a trend here?

Let's call Clemens what he really is: A mercenary for hire. As Sports Guy wrote, "We're coming closer and closer to my dream of Clemens' Hall of Fame plaque featuring a cap with a dollar sign on it." That said, is he also a Hall of Famer who will go down as one of the greatest pitchers of all-time? Yes, of course. But his annual "Will he or won't he return?" routine is tired and since only 3 teams in the league have a chance of signing him is of little consequence to a vast majority of General Managers.

Speaking of GM's, kudos to Yanks GM Brian Cashman for the brilliant move of spending $28 million on a less than sure thing after his 2007 pitching staff quickly came to resemble the Titanic post iceberg. What are you going to do if this doesn't work, Brian? Put pitching coach Ron Guidry back on the mound and bring back Whitey Ford? Injuries aside, it's not exactly an endorsement of the GM's offseason work when you need to overhaul your pitching staff a month into the season.

This was a semi-desperate move by a team whose ERA ranked 27th in baseball and who has been starting the likes of Darrell Rasner and Matt DeSalvo after half their staff pulled a groin, the low point perhaps being the back-to-back-to-back-to-back (that's right, 4 backs) home runs given up by sacrificial lamb Chase Wright (as in "He got Chased Wright to the locker room") in a loss to the Sox in Boston on April 22. The reality is the Yankees truly NEEDED Clemens more than Boston or Houston did. Quite frankly, given the way things went down with Clemens in Boston not only did I not think they needed him, but I did not want him back either.

But, as Sports Guy wrote in a recent blog posting, with the Clemens signing the 2007 Yankees now have a true villain. Though I can always work up a little hatred for ARod and Jeter, it just hasn't been the same for me in the Yankee villain department since Randy Johnson left town without a title. You'd better believe that yours truly in particular and Red Sox Nation in general will be chomping at the bit for Clemens' return to the cauldron that is Sox-Yanks. The best rivalry in sports just got even better.

A Case of the Babels

Having watched the film "Babel" on DVD recently, I could not resist posting a link to a strange story I read on Yahoo! Movies: Movie News. The film opened in Japan this past weekend, and apparently there have been 15 reported cases of nausea and headaches from moviegoers. This is nothing new for a movie to cause such a reaction, as similar reports came out after the release of "Breaking the Waves" in 1996, the film starring Emily Watson which is set in a remote Scottish village and features scenes at sea on an oil rig shot with hand held cameras. Also, I myself felt a bit queasy after watching the shaky camerawork of "The Blair Witch Project" (1999), which was shot entirely in documentary style.

http://movies.yahoo.com/mv/news/ap/20070502/117813012000.html

That history aside, let me just say that after sitting through the rather lengthy and in my opinion much overrated exercise in angst called "Babel" I felt a little ill myself, and it had nothing to do with the cinematography or sound. It has a lot to do with the fact that Brad Pitt wouldn't stop screaming and Rinko Kikuchi's Japanese schoolgirl character wouldn't stop taking her clothes off and coming on to every guy she met, including a police officer and her rather shocked dentist during a checkup. Cate Blanchett does a great job of bleeding and suffering, as that is pretty much all she is asked to do in the film. To its credit, the cinematography is beautiful and "Babel" is ambitious in scope with four stories shot in four countries in four languages. Unfortunately, it bored me in all four.